“We shouldn’t stay here long,” Howl says after we bring her up to speed. “With the shifters, we aren’t on a strict timetable like the Halloween mission. You opened the tower, it should be trivial to get back in later, so let’s just run a quick sweep and then return to the others for debrief.”
I sketch a mock salute. “Yes, boss!”
Howl shoots me an unimpressed look, but there’s less genuine annoyance than there would have been a month ago; I’m wearing her down, bit by funny bit.
“Honestly,” Agatha says, “leaving here will be a relief. This place gives me the creeps.”
Venus vanished while we were opening the door for Howl, and aside from her, we haven’t seen another soul. The park is full of cheering and chattering at the edge of hearing—an indistinct murmur of conversation that never clarifies into comprehensible speech—but there are no people. No one riding the coasters, no one stepping in or out of shops, no one at all in the whole area.
Animatronic magical girls are spaced throughout Venusland, each offering cheerful propaganda whenever someone makes the mistake of stepping into range of their motion sensors. At least none of these are real people; they’re all modeled after the Visage mascot, Yokohime Rin, a 3D rig and voice bank created to salvage all of the work done on virtual idols that the appearance of real magical girls overshadowed. She’s the ideal image of a magical girl, dressed in a pink uniform that combines aesthetic elements of Sailor Moon, Madoka Magica, and Cardcaptor Sakura.
“Did you know?” a Rin animatronic chirps, high-pitched and energetic. “Studies suggest that watching Visage broadcasts can increase your happiness levels by up to sixty-three percent! Our fans report feeling more confident and less lonely after participating in stream chat, hearing their donation messages read out, or joining an online community of fellow fans. Find your oshi today and let them know you’re watching!”
“Did you know?” chirps another. “Visage is responsible for creating thousands of jobs in Forks, Washington, and tens of thousands worldwide! We’re always looking for more hard-working, dedicated fans to make our dream a reality. Contact your local office to see how you can help our magical girls really shine!”
“Did you know? Our merch store runs a sale on the 1st of every month! Don’t shop less, shop smart. If you can’t normally afford that shirt or mousepad you really want, save up and wait for the 1st!”
“Did you know? Watching a stream with someone is a great bonding activity! Invite your friends and share your oshi!”
“Did you know? The Starlight Ruby Warriors anime is coming soon!”
“Did you know? There are tours of the Spire every day!”
“Did you know? Did you know? Did you know?”
The novelty of seeing an animatronic Rin gets old pretty quick.
We wander around the park for a while. Agatha and I are tempted by the delicious-smelling churro stand, but its scrumptious treasures are denied us by Howl’s withering stare of disapproval. We don’t go on any rides, either, though I spend a lot of time wondering what could be inside the Dusk & Dawn Tunnel of Close Sisterly Intimacy. We can’t fly in here, of course, same as it was in Glass Forks.
The Spire is an obvious destination, but it’s one we avoid; getting close will probably trigger the boss fight, and Howl wants us at full complement for that. Privately, I think the three of us could take it. Agatha and I have really upped our game since the last expedition, and I want to put my new toys to the test.
Despite the eerie lack of people and the annoying animatronics, there’s something almost relaxing about this strange, empty theme park. I feel so at home in liminal spaces, though Howl and Agatha don’t seem to share my contentment. Agatha’s been working on her confidence, but she still glances around nervously at each corner and alleyway as we pass through the park. Howl just looks annoyed, which I guess is kind of her default state.
“I haven’t been to an amusement park since I was a kid,” I say to lighten the mood. “My parents took me to a water park in the summer, but I hated swimming, so I was miserable the whole trip, which got them yelling at me for being ungrateful. The hot dogs afterward were nice, at least.”
“Eh, you’re not missing much,” says Howl with a shrug. “They’re tacky, overpriced, and full of people.”
Agatha looks at me with concern. “Was that how your parents normally treated you?”
I wave a hand dismissively. “You know how it is. Nobody really gets along with their parents, that’s why you work so hard to get a scholarship so you can fuck off to college and move out.”
“I get along with my parents just fine,” Agatha protests. “We go out for lunch every month to catch up. They even know I’m a magical girl. Your parents should be your first friends.”
Howl snorts. “Hell no. Parents are for twice-yearly calls that you sit through to stay in the will, awkward holiday dinners, and introducing them to partners you know they’ll like so that they offer to pay for dates at fancy restaurants.”
“That’s terribly cynical,” Agatha says. “Mercenary, even. Is that how you treat all your relationships?” There’s a teasing tone to her voice that makes me wonder how much of Howl’s past the two of them have discussed in their private training sessions.
We banter for a bit longer before Howl calls us to a stop outside Club Vivarium. I had an inkling from the name alone, but up close it’s obvious that this place is a rip-off of the Ossuary. The wide entrance to the brick structure is an archway of vines and flowers around a swirling white void, and a sign out front promises that the Visage girls are regularly available for meet-and-greets inside.
“Agatha, see anything different?” Howl asks.
The magical girl takes off her glasses and immediately squints against the chaotic mess of threads visible only to her. Her expression grows queasy, but she powers through and studies her surroundings intently. After a minute, she says, “No, it’s the same as everywhere else in this place. Visual noise, the only clear connections leading back to the tower in the middle.”
“It’s a layered dungeon,” I speculate. “We beat the guardian outside, then met the condition to get into the first floor, where we found another Spire and another guardian. I’d bet money next floor isn’t the last—there’ll be at least three levels, probably more—and I doubt anything of importance is going to be waiting for us on the outermost layer. This might be our shop level, our safe area, with only future floors having regular encounters.”
Howl sighs. “I hate that video games might actually be a relevant pull here.”
“We know Hastur fed her kids on a diet of Earth media,” I say with a grin. “Kind of amusing to imagine Mars and Venus fighting over the Xbox controller.”
“There’s another interpretation of this level,” Agatha muses, accepting my video game framing. “Venus is trying to indoctrinate us, right? She said at the gate that she wants to bring us around to her point of view. If that’s the goal, why throw enemies at us at all? Maybe the Spire guardians will be the only real danger on any floor—and that’s assuming the guardian here will be a fight and not some kind of puzzle or non-combat trial.”
“Concerns for our future expeditions,” Howl says firmly. “Ferromancer can analyze the energy flow to see if anything here is responsible, and I’m sure Striga will find something interesting about this place. I think we’re about done here, but I’m going to do one more lap of the park to see what my own sight gets me. Back in a few minutes.”
We nod our acceptance and Howl hops on the back of her wolf, which grows in size to make a better mount, before racing off into the distance.
“Well,” I say, “no point in standing around. Peckish?”
Agatha gives me a wry look. “A little, but what are the odds that the food here is poisoned or enchanted? Howl didn’t seem fond of us eyeing that churro cart.”
“The odds aren’t zero,” I admit, “but c’mon, if Howl could tell something actually wrong with the food she would have said that instead of just glaring, which, let’s be honest, is most of what her face does anyway. And those churros, though.”
“I’d do unspeakable things for a good churro.” Agatha sighs dreamily. “I haven’t had one in forever.”
“Game theory: if Venus is trying to use this place to convert us, outright mind control is actually counterproductive. Sure, she might win the lotto and actually nab someone, but there’s no way she gets us all—you saw how Howl is treating this place—and the inevitable result would be the afflicted getting freed and never, ever trusting Venus again. If she wants us to accept any of her offers, she has to play fair until the very last moment.”
“Okay, fine, you’ve convinced me.” Agatha sticks her tongue out, eyes twinkling, and we go looking for food.
The churros are, in fact, delicious. It’s amazing how much you can do with fried dough and cinnamon sugar. I don’t suddenly start fawning over Venus after devouring my three, so that’s a point in the “not mind control” camp.
Agatha seems to be enjoying them even more than me, with the look on her face best described as rapturous bliss. “God, these are just as good as I remembered. There has to be a churro place in Forks, right?”
“Almost certainly. If not, Seattle’s a short flight.” Less than an hour at my top speed, though I don’t know Agatha’s. “So, wrapping back to our earlier conversation, I’m going to guess you’ve been to a theme park or two?”
Agatha nods. “Oh yeah, I used to go down to Legoland every year with my folks. It was a big event. Another family paid for us—they were close friends of my parents, former coworkers that went into higher business—and we paid for a couple of my friends whose parents didn’t have the money for it. Flew down to the one in California, played minigolf, ate the churros, and, of course, built Legos. I was never much for the rides, honestly, but I loved Lego when I was a kid. I always wanted to see what cool new builds I could put together from different sets, and at one point I was dreaming of designing my own product line.” She blushes. “That was, um, a little overly ambitious for a nine-year-old.”
“Bet you could do it now, and on Visage money.” I grin at her startled expression. “I mean, they love that shit, right? Crossovers, tie-ins, the works. One conversation with Memento and you could be on call with a Lego representative gushing about how much you love their product. They’d totally let you be the creative consultant on making a Visage set.”
Agatha stares off into space, starry-eyed and biting her lip. “I… I don’t know. That sounds too good to be true, and I’d hate to get worked up for it and then be disappointed.”
“I’m surprised you’ve never done a chill building stream. Do you not collect anymore?”
“Oh, I do,” she answers immediately and enthusiastically. “This job has made it so, so much easier to keep up with releases. I guess, well… I’ve thought about it, but I worry I’ve pigeonholed myself too much as the ‘mystery solver girl.’ I’m still the new kid on the block in Visage, at least on my side of the aisle, and I don’t want to give the higher ups any reason to criticize me.” She grimaces, then shakes her head. “Enough about me, what about you? How have you been adapting to the idol life?”
“Well, you know, it has its ups and downs.” I pause for a beat, then grin from ear to ear. “It’s fuckin’ awesome, I love it, oh my god the rush. People give me tens and hundreds just to hear me read out their dumb usernames. I’ve got one guy who keeps trying to get me with ‘deez nuts’ jokes, that’s a gold mine. The attention is a drug, and I would know.”
Agatha laughs. “Oh, man, you’re taking to it way better than I did. I… well, I became a magical girl for some very silly reasons. I wanted to be like my favorite book character. But, it was all just… too mundane. I could roleplay a detective, sure, but what good was I really doing that other people weren’t way, way more qualified for? There weren’t any grand eldritch conspiracies to unravel—that I knew of—and I wanted to pay off my college loans and make life a little easier for my friends and family, so… Visage!”
“And then all of this.”
“And then this,” Agatha agrees. “When Lady Striga approached me, I was beyond honored, but more than that I felt like finally I had a chance to be a hero like the girl I took my name from.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Agatha? I always thought that was an Agatha Christie reference.”
“Oh, it is! It’s the, um, surname that I was talking about.” Agatha’s cheeks redden again, but there’s a strange trace of pride in her voice as she says, “‘Cain,’ from Valkyrie Cain, the protagonist of an urban fantasy series I was obsessed with as a kid, and a teen, and honestly even now. She gets magic powers, fights evil gods, and solves mysteries. I wanted to be her. I guess I still do. Sorry, I know that’s such a lame reason.”
I burst out laughing. Agatha blushes deeper, and she looks like she’s about to say something when I finally gain control of myself and get out, “No, no, not laughing at you. At myself. Much, much stupider reason. Promise. Can’t tell you, sorry. Opsec. But trust me, your motivation is downright saintly in comparison to mine. I mean, I am a witch. Team Evil recruited me for a reason, even if they totally missed the mark on where my real loyalties lie. Seriously, Aggie, that’s great. You’re living every kid’s dream.”
She smiles softly. “Thanks. I hope I’m worthy of it.”
“Bah. Fuck being worthy, do it anyway.”
I straighten up in time to see Howl coming around the corner on her wolf. The other witch dismounts in front of us with a bored expression on her face.
“It’s a bust. Let’s get out of here.”
A wave of disappointment washes over me. We’re leaving already? But I haven’t gotten to kill anything! My new toys! I raise my hand, flash a cocksure grin, and say, “Okay, I hear you, but consider: what if we went and fought the floor guardian?”
Howl blinks at me slowly. “Do I even need to say it?” Agatha throws me a considering look, but doesn’t interject.
I roll my eyes. “Oh, come on. Agatha and I are way stronger than we were a month ago. We’ve been training! Plus, the thing outside was clearly Hastur’s pet, and this domain feels strictly Venus. I bet this one’s weaker, like when you fight a boss and then it becomes a regular enemy in future zones.”
Agatha suppresses a giggle. “I mean, that does happen.”
“You already acquiesced that video game logic is relevant here,” I point out. “Plus, if we can clear the boss now and unlock the second layer, it’ll mean even more data for the others to gather when we come back with the full team. It’s efficient!”
“Less efficient than hitting it with double the numbers,” Howl grumbles, but she’s not shutting me down completely.
“C’mon,” I cajole, “you want a fight, too, I know you do. Let’s hunt something together, Howl. Let’s take a risk and get our beaks wet.”
She throws up her hands. “Ugh, fine! But if this goes wrong, I’m not bailing you out.”
I give her a smug look back. “Of course not. I’m the one with the infinite supply of shifters. I’ll be bailing you out.”
Time to test my new toys. My beautiful, beautiful toys.
[commentary]
Have you ever been to Legoland? I’m not kidding about the churros. They’re fantastic.
A special thank you to my Grandmaster-tier patrons, whose support has kept food on my table: Adrian CC, Ashlyn, CaosSorge, Crows Danger, Demi, Lirian, M, Mgbm, Mhai Wind, Morrigan, October, Paige Harvey, PR4v1 Samaratunga, and Selacanis. Wow that’s a lot of you! Thank you so much!
If you like this story and want to see more of it, please go to the RR page and leave a rating or review! Web serials live and die on audience support, and this one is no exception. The better the story does on RR, the more people click through and read, the more motivation I have (both on a mental health level and on an “able to pay rent” level) to keep writing and to write faster.
The next scheduled break week starts on the 7th of December. It’ll be another double length break as I work on my second writing project and some outline rewrites for TMGM.
[/commentary]