“I still feel so bad about yesterday, I’m really sorry about that. I didn’t—”

“It’s fine,” I assure Agatha. “I get it, I promise. Honestly, you’re not wrong to feel a little weirded out by all this. I mean, professional actors work with intimacy coordinates for scenes that are arguably less intense, if more… conventionally physical. Don’t worry about it.”

It’s the second week of January. My next date with Sophia is just a few days away and it’s all I want to think about, but tragically I have “responsibilities” now. I’m sitting with Agatha in one of the Spire’s many lounges, waiting to be called in for a performance review with Radiance and Memento.

Since joining Visage, I’ve been developing Archon’s brand as the ultimate obsessive fangirl. Most of the time that just means getting excited over products with Visage performers on them and doing my monthly clip show, but there’s also the storyline that I’ve been cultivating with Agatha. It’s a way to bolster both of our followings—the fights might be scripted, but they still get shared wider than anything else Visage produces—and it has, to be blunt, not been going smoothly.

Agatha can fight and banter just fine, but she can’t really play along when it comes to the flirtation that’s so essential to a plotline about the wicked witch pursuing the innocent heroine. Frustration, antipathy, coldness, all that she can do, but she never blushes in that way where you can’t quite tell if she’s just embarrassed by the situation or secretly likes it. Her breath never catches when I lean in as if for a kiss. She’s always so tense when we fight, and that influences her body language in ways that the savvy viewer is going to notice. In filthy weeb terms, I’m trying to sell a yandere on tsundere relationship, and Agatha’s giving me all tsun, no dere.

I admit, I still enjoy our fights. Agatha’s cute, and she gets even cuter when I’m tying her up, pinning her against a wall, or getting right up against her and whispering in her ear. She might not flirt back, but she makes adorable noises whenever I land a hit on her.

There’s an argument to be made that I shouldn’t enjoy that as much as I do. For Agatha’s discomfort, sure, but really I just feel guilty about having fun with another girl while I’m finally getting to go on dates with Sophia. It feels wrong to experience any amount of attraction toward another woman. Though, I do wonder what Sophia would think about bringing over a girl for us to tease and play with together…

Okay, I’m getting ahead of myself. Right now, I need to focus on managing Agatha’s feelings. By acting sympathetic to her plight and understanding of her situation, I can secure her continued loyalty—or friendship, I guess you’d call it if you weren’t an edgy weirdo with Borderline Personality Disorder. Regardless, my own desires are mostly irrelevant.

Agatha’s been sitting quietly while I daydreamed, but as I turn toward her she blurts out, “It feels gross. I feel gross, doing this. The fact that this is a thing we do at all.”

I arch an eyebrow dramatically. “Oh? In what sense? You don’t mean…”

The magical girl pauses for a second, then blushes bright red and waves her hands around in a panic. “Not because it’s gay! God, I just realized how that could be interpreted, that’s not what I meant at all. I’m not like. That’s not. I’m straight, but—I don’t think lesbians are gross! Oh, just kill me now.” She buries her face in her hands and groans.

I can’t help but laugh. This girl is way too cute. I love a sopping wet cat. I file away her orientation, which I wasn’t expecting but probably should have guessed? I mean, most people are straight, but spending most of your time in queer circles means you encounter a disproportionate number of other queers, and that’s surprisingly held true for most of the magical girls and witches I’ve interacted with, I think. Maybe the King in Yellow has a thing for lesbians—or is one. Homosexual Hastur mashing her magical girl dolls together.

“Relax,” I comfort Agatha. “I didn’t think you meant it like that. Though, I have to admit, I’m a little curious if doing those scenes is any worse because you know I’m gay.” I pause, then add, “I don’t think I’ve told you that explicitly, but fucking everyone clocks me as a big gay homo lesbian after one conversation with me, so, I figured you knew.”

Agatha relaxes, lets out a tiny giggle, and raises her head. “I might have had an inkling, yes. Maybe in another world that might have made it worse, but, I mean…” Agatha hesitates, biting her lip. “Sorry, I’m trying to think of a way to say this that doesn’t sound, um, bigoted, I guess? It’s… there’s some weird cultural stuff at play, so, preemptive apology. Sorry.”

I snort. “Please. If you can get through it without calling me a slur you’ll be doing better than most of the conversations I’ve had about my sexuality.”

Agatha winces. “Ouch. That’s… wow. Okay then. Well… I guess, when you flirt with me in a scene, there’s a part of me that has this learned aversion, but it’s a small part. Because I know you—because I can tell that your eyes are on someone else. So I don’t feel like I’m actually being pursued, so I’m not ‘in danger’ or anything. It’s the situation, not the interest.”

Ah, she’s talking around Striga. The Jovians know that I have a crush on Striga. Agatha also knows that I have a crush on Striga, or at least she’s probably guessed as much from the way my eyes linger in our secret meetings. The innocent Agatha who only knows Archon through Visage, however, wouldn’t have a clue about any of that. It’s a layer cake of “I know that you know that she knows that I know,” where everyone knows I’m madly in love with Striga but nobody can talk about it openly without exposing the whole game.

I wave for Agatha to go on, keeping my expression placid and understanding. She recovers a bit more of her confidence and rambles on, “It’s about the culture, I think. The expectations. The lying. And I know that so much of what we do is—is ‘kayfabe,’ I’ve heard it called. But the fights are an honest lie, in some sense; everyone watching us go at it knows that we’re not really going to hurt each other or try to kill each other, because that would be bad for business and it’s all just pretend. But the flirting. The hinting and teasing. The…”

“Yuri baiting,” I supply with a grin.

Agatha cringes at the name. “Yes, that. There are fans online—lots of them, thousands of them—who talk about it like they think it’s real. Threads speculating about secret relationships and reading into everything we say and do. And that’s a success, right? We want people to think that it could be real, because that gets the fans more invested in the dynamic. So it all ends up feeling… manipulative, I guess. Like we’re deceiving them into thinking we might actually become a couple, in real life, outside of the ‘kayfabe’ of our work as entertainers.”

I consider what approach is best here. I should try to be supportive, but I think Agatha has seen too much of my more mercenary side to believe that I’d actually take umbrage with being manipulative. On the other hand, going full Mordacity and spouting off about the intrinsic deceptive elements of all communication would probably just get me a weird look. I need to demonstrate that I’m on Agatha’s side while maneuvering her toward thinking more like me. Because I need to think more like Venus; that’s how I’m going to kill her.

Before I can settle on an approach, one of the upper floor secretaries pops her head in and lets us know the meeting room is ready. We head inside.

This office isn’t as nice as the one I went to for my first talk with Visage brass, but I was expecting that. It’s a pretty normal dedicated meeting space. Nice table, decent chairs, a widescreen. And hey, no giant rock hanging over the table like a Sword of Damocles, so definitionally not the worst I’ve seen.

Radiance looks the same as ever—rich, stylish, clad in rainbow white—as she waves us in and gestures for us to sit anywhere. Memento is seated across from her and smiles at us as we enter.

Where Radiance could be mistaken for a high-fashion business aristocrat, Memento cultivates a more fantastical presentation. Her ornate black dress is embellished with real gold, and gemstones of onyx and ruby orbit her gently, kept aloft by her magic. Memento, the “Underworld Heiress,” has a pretty obvious power: Hades, lord of all the riches of the earth. It’s her control over precious metals that keeps the orb levitating above the Spire.

Reach and profit. Appeal to their interests, get close, and figure out which of them we need to brutally murder.

I’ve interacted with Radiance a few times by now, but I only met Memento very briefly during orientation. For Agatha, I imagine the opposite is true. Of course, I’ve seen Memento plenty of times on stream.

“Archon,” she greets warmly. “It’s good to see you again. Are things going well?”

“It’s been great!” I say cheerfully, taking the lead. “It’s been, what, two months? Best two months of my life, honestly. I’m really looking forward to that Magic stream next week.”

Getting Memento to agree to that stream idea will probably go down as my proudest accomplishment in Visage. The cheer in my voice isn’t even injected, I’m genuinely excited to play a stupid card game with someone I’ve fangirled over in chat—even if I have to kill her later.

“Of course,” Memento says. “And don’t worry, I’ve been practicing. Agatha, how are you? You started up a new visual novel, right? Umineko, I think it was called?”

Agatha was looking nervous as she took her seat, but she brightens immediately at Memento’s questioning. “Oh, yes! I’ve wanted to read through it for a while, it’s got a really interesting premise. I—well, I won’t bore you with the details, but I think it’s going to be a really fun few months of streaming. My, um, audience has been really excited for this one.”

“That’s wonderful! Well, shall we get right to it?” Memento glances at Radiance questioningly, who nods and taps away on her laptop.

“Let’s,” Radiance says calmly. “I’d like to be clear up front that both of you are performing at or above the minimum on all the metrics we care about. Please dispel any anxieties about being dressed down or facing punitive action. While we do have notes for improvement, they will be offered purely in the spirit of mutual benefit. I hope this can be an enjoyable and productive conversation for all of us.”

I would comment on how this management style compares to my previous jobs, but I’ve never had any previous jobs, so all my expectations are from media. Radiance and Memento seem nice, as bosses go, which tells me basically nothing; anyone who’s been in the influencer game this long has to get good at hiding their true feelings.

We go over our ventures. Radiance highlights my monthly roundup as an excellent discovery tool that the main Visage channels will signal boost, and suggests making it twice monthly instead. Memento updates Agatha on the progress of negotiations with the Lego people. Agatha and I are both hitting the niches we expect to be popular with, and we’re making enough money through subs, donations, and merch sales to keep the company happy. There are a few brand deals to arrange and some notes on viewer engagement, but overall, we’re doing well.

Then we get to the real pain point.

“I’m of the mind that we’ve already used and overused this space,” Memento says, talking about the yuri bait storyline. “It’s been a mainstay and it’s drummed up excitement in online spaces, but quite frankly I’m not sure there’s much to be gained with more of the same. It’s not growing our potential audience; it’s creating competition within the existing audience.”

Radiance purses her lips. “I disagree. Market research has Archon polling very highly with LGBT members of our audience—higher than any other talent in the early stages of a shipping push. I believe that could be leveraged to pull more eyes away from the indie scene, drawing in fans who want bold, textual interest.”

“We could engineer a leak,” I offer. “Something to connect a private account to me that demonstrates I’m genuinely a lesbian in my personal life. Normal etiquette on social media forums like subreddits is to suppress that kind of information, but it’ll be there for anyone who wants to find it, which could generate word of mouth buzz in the communities we’re targeting.”

Radiance hums and types something down. “Good initiative. I’ll run it by the team. There is, however, a more pressing issue.” Her attention settles on Agatha, who almost manages not to squirm in her seat. “If the dynamic is too one-sided, there’s a risk of turning viewers away. The audience subset we’re specifically trying to court will notice if there’s no promise of potential reciprocation. We need more out of you, Agatha. More fluster, less stonewalling.”

The magical girl hesitates. “I… I understand. I was talking about that with Archon, actually, just before you called us in.”

“If it’s uncomfortable for you,” Memento says with sympathy in her voice, “we wouldn’t want to force you through it. It’s still early enough that we can find someone else to play the part, and you can settle into a more natural dynamic when you collaborate with Archon.”

Polite and benevolent, but the message is still clear: do the job or get out. “I think finding a natural dynamic could actually help the shipping push,” I pipe up. “We’ve got great chemistry when we’re hanging together outside of scenes. I’ve got a few lighter things planned for this month—pranks on the Minecraft server with Glamour and Sweet, for one—and I think a lower stakes environment will do a lot to help.”

Radiance nods. “Reasonable. We’ll have to see how it plays out. It’s my understanding that you’ve secured an invite to Maenad’s upcoming party, is that right, Archon?” I nod back and she continues, “It’ll be quite the event. If Agatha can sell her role, the party will be a perfect opportunity to cement your dynamic. Consider February your deadline, then. I believe that will be all.”

I say, “Of course, and thank you for your time.”

Agatha mumbles her own thanks. As soon as we’re out of sight, she sags. “That was awful. What am I going to do?”

I pat her on the shoulder. “Hey, don’t worry about it right now. We’ve got time to figure something out. I think what you need is to get back in your element.” I pull out my phone and shoot a quick text to Ferromancer as I lead Agatha to one of the Spire balconies. When I get an affirmative response, I conjure a shifter into my hand and hold it out to Agatha. “Let’s get some real detective work done, yeah?”

Agatha grins and grabs the device, and then I take us back to the World of Glass.

[commentary]

gosh radiance and memento seem like such good hashtag allies. dontcha love rainbow capitalism?

A special thank you to my Grandmaster-tier patrons, whose support has kept food on my table: Adrian CC, Ashlyn, CaosSorge, Crows Danger, Demi, Lirian, M, Mgbm, Mhai Wind, Morrigan, October, Paige Harvey, PR4v1 Samaratunga, and Selacanis. Wow that’s a lot of you! Thank you so much!

If you like this story and want to see more of it, please go to the RR page and leave a rating or review! Web serials live and die on audience support, and this one is no exception. The better the story does on RR, the more people click through and read, the more motivation I have (both on a mental health level and on an “able to pay rent” level) to keep writing and to write faster.

The next scheduled break week starts on the 11th of January.

[/commentary]